Classic Comic Awesome

This week on Nerdiodrome, where we find awesome comic book stuff and share with the world wide web: BATMAN VS. NINJA ASSASSIN GUYS

You're gonna have to bear with me on this one. You see, I am an unmitigated fan of the Batman--I love that he really doesn't have superpowers, I love that he doesn't really tend to think of himself as a hero, I love that his greatest asset isn't his formidable combat prowess or even his effectively limitless wealth, it's that he's the World's Greatest Detective--implying lots of smarts, but also an understanding of human nature and ability to deal with it on many levels.

So Batman's going to have a lot of moments at Nerdiodrome. Perhaps a disproportionate amount. If you have a problem with that, I can't help you. Maybe I don't want to help you.

The first comic book I bought with my very own money was an issue of Detective Comics from 1989 or 1990--part of a 3 issue story that pit the Ventriloquist against the Penguin, if my memory is accurate, written by Alan Grant with art by Norm Breyfogle. I of course knew about Batman from before then, from Scooby Doo, and from Superfriends, and from comics books. I knew about the two Robins from this time, and that one of them had recently died. In fact, we're going to around that time, to just after A Death In The Family (the first collection I bought with my own money), two issues after it ended, in fact. Batman 431.

The previous issue was the last one that Jim Starlin, the writer of A Death In The Family and of the Batman comic for a few years, would work on. As filler until the next permanent writer came on, a guy named James Owsley wrote two issues. This is the first.

(incidentally, James Owsley would later gain more recognition under the pen name Christopher Priest, and writing for Marvel's The Black Panther)

Also? Jim Aparo art. The late Jim Aparo was always my favorite Batman artist. When I close my eyes and imagine Batman, it looks like this guy:

The issue begins with a brief flashback to Bruce's time training and gathering his skills a decade before, searching for the dojo and temple of a Master Kirigi. The flashback ends when Bruce gains admittance to the dojo, and we're suddenly in Gotham. Bruce is wrapping up the investigation of Ralph Stuart, a crime boss who turned himself in suddenly and unexpectantly, and bemoaning in internal monologue that he'd been looking forward to busting the guy himself. Maybe it would take his mind off the recent death of Jason Todd . . .

The investigation included secret surveillance (audio) tapes of the crime boss's conversation, and he pawns listening to--and transcribing--them off on Alfred as he tries to take his butler's advice and gets some sleep. Unfortunately, he hasn't even five hours later, when Alfred suddenly calls him and tells him there's something disturbing on one of the tapes. The audience doesn't yet learn what, though, as we instead cut to--

Frikkin' awesome.

But! That was actually just the appetizer.

So Batman manages to intimidate Stuart, who spills it all. Batman investigates further, and--

The "precautions" Mugs spoke of involved ordering a hit on the federal prosecutor handling the case. After Batman puts the fear of God into him and leaves, Mugs calls the League of Assassins' broker, a Thaddeus Gladden, desparate to call off the hit. Batman follows the trail to Gladden's house, but is disappointed.

WARNING: what you are about to read has been deemed "AWESOME" by trained professionals. Do not attempt to replicate it by any means. You simply aren't awesome enough.

Five and a half pages to deal with 3 out of 4 ninjas. This was a time before Batman became the unstoppable force of nature he's often presented as in modern comics--the so-called Bat-God. Oh, he'll still win, but nowadays he could have beaten them in 2, 3 pages tops. And there's still one to go:

Of course the guy's not dead. Batman's so awesome he can use a killing technique, the "vibrating palm," and use it to disable, not kill.

So there you have it. Batman versus four ninja. Awesomely.

Aaron "The Mad Whitaker" Bourque; this issue has never been reprinted! That's a travesty.